If you’re going through a spiritual awakening, welcome to the growing club of expanding consciousness.

This is such a good thing, but you already know it’s not easy.

I’m going through the process right now and have had a “dark night of the soul” experience that almost sent me running back to the comfort and safety of my old ways.

But here’s the thing…

You can’t unknow things.

Deep down, I knew that going back wasn’t sustainable. So I had to face the pain and power through. There is a reason it hurts, and it’s all completely worthwhile.

Why is spiritual awakening painful?

Everyone’s experience with a spiritual awakening will be different, but there are some common themes. Pain is one of them.

Pain seems to be part of the awakening process for everyone without exception.

Some hurt more than others and some feel physical pain in addition to the emotional torment.

But if you’re going through this, you probably want answers. Why does something that’s ultimately good for you hurt so much?

Here are a few reasons.

1.      You’re shedding the ego

In order to fully understand the ego’s role in this process, I urge you to read this post. It will also help you get a feel for how strong of a hold the ego has on your life. And the stronger the hold, the more the spiritual awakening will hurt.

In summary…

The ego is part of the mind that ultimately keeps you safe in our society. So the ego will naturally fight anything that goes against your beliefs about what’s “the norm.”

And although I’m talking about the ego as if it’s a separate entity, it’s not. This is part of you, so we’re really talking about an internal struggle.

The ego may have helped you suppress emotions that were painful, and it most definitely kept  you in repeating (familiar) patterns that do not serve you.

And it’s not going down without a fight.

2.      You’re entering uncertain territory

It’s always scary to go to new places, but it’s also somewhat exciting. You don’t know exactly where you’re going, and you naturally fear that you’re moving the wrong way. Again, this is the ego at play. Remember, the ego’s job is to keep you safe, which means avoiding risks.

3.      You’re bucking societal norms

This is a big one for many people. Even if you’re certain you’re on the right path… even if you feel it intuitively… you’re probably walking this path alone. And that can come with a host of unpleasant feelings. You worry about what other people will think if they find out what’s going on with you.

4.      You’re afraid you’ve gone crazy

As you get deeper into your awakening, you may find you’re open to learning about things that you once thought were crazy. You watch Youtube videos that you once would have made fun of – and they’re resonating with you. It’s natural to think you’ve lost your mind. But in reality, you’re just shedding your ego.

How to reduce the pain of a spiritual awakening

The best way to get over the pain of an awakening is to push through it. I’m talking about rolling up your sleeves and powering deep through the emotional baggage you’ve been carrying around with you. It’s ugly and emotional, but you will come through the other side much stronger.

Here are a few tips to get through it:

1.      Don’t resist

When I gave birth to my daughter, someone gave me this advice: The more you resist the pain, the more you’ll feel it. And it was so true. Pain is an inevitable part of childbirth, and you can’t will it away.

The same is true for a spiritual awakening. You are experiencing this pain for a reason. There are lessons in your pain that you need to learn. If you resist learning the lessons, the pain will remain.

2.      Share cautiously

You may love and respect someone immensely, but unless they have been through this, they cannot help you. And if you start talking about this stuff with someone who isn’t awakened, they’re likely to think you’ve lost your mind (and that’s probably one of your pain points). Instead of sharing in terms of awakening, share the emotional work you’re going through. Everyone can understand this.

Once you’ve made it to the other side of the pain, you can talk in terms of awakening if that feels right. Or, if you have someone who won’t react adversely, go ahead and share.

3.      Get out in nature

You may be feeling depressed, fearful, angry or any combination of bad feelings right now. But you’ll find clarity in nature. One of the reasons why you’re hurting is that your ego is holding strong to all the rules of society. But these rules aren’t present in nature. Here, there’s no judgment. You’re free to be your authentic self among the trees, bushes and streams. Get outside every day if possible.

Now, I want to hear from you.

Where are you in the stage of spiritual awakening? Do you have any tips for reducing the pain that have worked for you?


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  1. Paula Marques June 30, 2020 Reply

    Dear Cristina, Nice to see the changes on the website, as well as your contacts available. I am also happy to see that purchasing the self-help program from abroad is now possible. Am looking forward to practising! I have recently watched all your videos and I did actually comment one of them, not sure which one... :) Like I mentioned in the comments, you have literally changed my life! Finding your videos, specially the one about the 11 signs related to covert narcissism was such a turning point for me and I am so very grateful for that. If it was not for you, I would not have known that I was married to a covert narcissist for 24 years. Besides the 11 signs you mentioned on that specific video, I would add the lack of sense of humor and how they have a tendency to keep you away from family and friends as signs too. The blaming was also dreadfull in my case, everything was "my fault". I have been divorced for 3 years yet I am still struggling. I still feel pretty stupid and ashamed, heartsore evidently, yet he feeling of betrayal is almost unbearable, as well as the sense of lack of worth. Ofcourse, your info, as some extra research on my behalf, has put things in perspective for me now. I have just finished reading Dr. Inaki Pinuel´s book "Amor Zero". I don´t know if it has been translated to English but it has also been of tremendous help. Like I said, you opened the door for me and I thank you so very much for that. I think you are absolutely lovely, by the way, you are so clear and to the point, so I look forward to seeing all your new videos and reading all your material. Wish you the best of luck as well as tremendous success and happiness. A big hug from a huge fan! Paula Fernandes Marques (Portugal).